Roommate Relations


At UB, you’re going to live in the most diverse environment you’ve ever experienced. For most students, this is an incredibly rewarding and enriching opportunity. But for some, it make take a bit more time and effort to learn how to get along with someone who is different than you are. We’re here to help you resolve any issues you may have. 

On this page:

The biggest mistake roommates make is not discussing a problem as it develops. If something is bothering you, talk to your roommate about it.

Get to Know Your Roommate

If you and your roommate are having challenges living together, there are a number of ways to improve your relationship. Learning more about your roommate and talking about expectations from the beginning can help you find common interests—and prevent problems in the future. Here are some questions to help you get to know each other.


  • What is your family like? 
  • Why did you choose UB?
  • What are your interests and hobbies? 


  • What time of day/night do you study? 
  • Where do you prefer to study? 
  • How much noise can you tolerate when studying? 
  • What grades do you hope to make?


  • Do you enjoy being alone? 
  • Do you need or want company? 
  • Are you outgoing or more introverted? 
  • How do you express anger? 
  • How do you show when you’re depressed? 
  • Are you aggressive, assertive or passive?


  • What are your attitudes about religion? 
  • What about politics? 
  • How do you feel about alcohol and drug use? 
  • What are your attitudes about sex? 
  • Are you a night owl or a day person? 
  • How organized do you like to be? 
  • Do you plan ahead, or do you deal with things as they happen? 
  • How do you feel about borrowing and lending clothes? 
  • What about sharing food?
  • How do you feel about sharing personal items?


  • Are you sloppy or neat? 
  • How do you prefer to divide chores? 


  • What hours will guests be welcome? 
  • How many guests do you want to have at a time? 
  • What about overnight guests? 
  • What about guests of the opposite sex?
What If I Don’t Get Along With My Roommate?

Many issues can be resolved by talking about concerns as they arise and by setting reasonable expectations for living together. If you and your roommates are still having challenges, talk to your resident advisor or community assistant, who can help you resolve roommate issues. 

Roommate Agreements

Having a mutual agreement about the “rules” for your room or apartment can help you handle many common issues. Even if your roommate is your best friend, you will want to discuss how life as roommates will work. Your resident advisor or complex director is also available to help you establish these agreements.

How to Write a Roommate Agreement

For each of the areas, talk with your roommate, agree upon a procedure and write it down. 

  • What kind of communication you will have
  • Quiet time
  • Guests
  • Guest hours
  • Room or apartment cleanliness
  • Borrowing (food, clothing, etc.)
  • Stereo, radio and TV use
  • Personal habits
  • Other specific topics
  • For those in apartments: doing dishes, purchasing household items such as toilet paper and cleaning supplies, and shared food items (is everything in the refrigerator fair game, or should all food items be marked?)