Finding Your Tribe

Ever been scrolling through Instagram and felt that FOMO hit hard, seeing everyone else at parties and hanging out while you're chilling solo in your dorm? You’re definitely not the only one. Many of us feel left out, but it’s time to debunk some myths that might be holding you back from making meaningful connections. Here are five friendship lies and how to beat them using the recreational opportunities available at the University at Buffalo.

It’s easy to think everyone else is having a blast 24/7, but remember, social media is just a highlight reel. If you’re feeling excluded, it’s time to take charge of your social life. One great way to do this is by exploring recreation at UB. Whether you’re down for intramural sports, participating in fitness classes, or a chill Open REC: Program like Unplug & Play, UB Recreation offers tons of activities where you can meet new people and create your own fun experiences.

A lot of us freak out about not being liked, but here's the tea: people probably vibe with you more than you think! Instead of stressing about fitting in, just assume people are curious to know you. Participating in UB's recreational programs can be a fantastic way to break the ice. Whether you're into running or playing basketball, shared interests make for easy convo starters and can seriously boost your social confidence.

We’ve all heard the term “BFF,” but not all friendships are meant to last forever, and that’s okay. Some friends are there for a reason, others for a season, and a few for a lifetime. Be flexible and cherish each friendship for what it brings to your life without stressing about its longevity. UB’s varied recreational offerings mean you’ll meet different people in different contexts, allowing friendships to develop organically and without pressure.

Trying to vibe with everyone is low-key draining and totally unnecessary. Not everyone will be your friend, and that’s perfectly fine. Focus on building legit connections with people who really get you. UB’s recreation programs got your back to find your crew. Whether it’s a specific Open REC: Sport or a REC Class, you’ll find your tribe among like-minded individuals.

Life's crazy busy, and being an introvert is totally valid, but friendships are crucial for our mental health. Even if it’s just sending a text or meeting for coffee, small efforts can lead to meaningful connections. Balancing your schedule to include UB’s flexible recreational activities can help. Many programs are designed to fit into a student’s busy life, offering a variety of times and formats to suit your needs.

1. Reason, Season, and Lifetime Framework: Understand that friendships can fall into these categories. Some friends help you through specific situations (reason), some are part of your life for a certain period (season), and a few stick around forever (lifetime). Embrace this natural flow and don’t cling too tightly to any one friendship.
2. Taking Action: Step out of your comfort zone. Reach out to people, initiate plans, and be the one to make the first move. It might feel awkward at first, but taking the initiative shows you’re interested in building a connection. Participating in UB's recreational events can be an easy and structured way to start.
3. Sending Random Messages: Make it a habit to text a friend every day with something simple—a meme, a compliment, or just a “thinking of you” message. These small gestures can strengthen bonds and show your friends that you care.

Don't let these common myths hold you back from the amazing friendships you deserve. Support each other, hype each other up, and take those steps to make the real connections that make college life unforgettable. Exploring the recreational opportunities at the University at Buffalo can be your gateway to finding those incredible friendships. Your tribe is out there—go find them!